Managing Personal Relationships at Work: Employer Guide

Personal relationships at work refer to close connections between employees, which can include friendships, family ties, or romantic and intimate relationships. Such relationships can arise naturally due to shared workspaces and experiences. While these connections can have positive effects, such as boosting morale and teamwork, they can also create challenges if not managed appropriately.

With such a broad definition, it would generally be regarded as onerous and unrealistic to interfere with an employee’s rights to a private life by restricting or imposing an outright ban on personal relationships at work. Employers are therefore encouraged to accept that such relationships are part and parcel of employing staff.

However, it can be beneficial in terms of workplace performance and morale, and legal risk management, to consider how personal work relationships may affect your business and that you can be satisfied you have done everything within your power to accommodate personal relationships at work. Clarity and encouraging a culture of honesty and openness are key principles in ensuring both you and your employee are protected at all times.

There are practical measures employers can take to manage any potential risk of personal relationships at work. In particular, by implementing guidelines through workplace policies, you can ensure your workforce knows where they stand, and if relationships deteriorate, how any resulting issues should be dealt with.

 

Personal relationships at work – a cause for concern?

 

With the average person spending 90,000 working hours over the course of their lifetime, it’s highly likely romantic relationships will begin at work. But it is not always bad news. In most cases, relationships in the workplace cause no problems for the employer, and they can in fact bring many benefits, such as:

 

• Increased personal interest in the business’s success
• Greater commitment towards the business
• Attaining wider business knowledge because of employees discussing their roles and issues with one another
  Easing the search for employees and reducing its cost by introducing a partner or family member to the business (although this must be as part of a consistent and fair selection process)
• Recommendations from existing staff will usually be for like-minded people who are more likely to fit into the culture of your business
• Reduces costs for couples, such as halving travelling to work expenses, or saves doubling-up on medical insurance
• Helps to make you a visible and recommended local employer by recruiting individuals from the same locality.

 

However – workplace relationships do have the potential to be detrimental to a business in the absence of clear rules or boundaries or effective management. It’s also important to remember that personal relationships at work may not be limited to sexual or romantic relationships, but can also include family relationships, very close friendships, and close business, financial or commercial relationships, any of which can complicate dynamics and wider relations in the workplace.

The risks of personal relationships at work include:

 

Preferential and inconsistent treatment of employees

 

Where two or more employees are related or have a personal relationship within the same team, you should consider the potential impact or perceived impact on other team members and working practices. This is particularly important where one reports to the other. For example, consider how annual leave requests are handled, how shift patterns operate, and other sign-off processes within your business, such as expenses. All such management and workforce decisions should be made consistently and fairly.

 

Confidentiality breaches

 

Employers will want to avoid situations where an employee has abused their position of trust and confidentiality due to a close relationship. Those who have personal relationships should not work together if there is any risk of a breach of confidentiality due to the overlap of their personal and professional relationship.

 

Inappropriate behaviours

 

Each workplace will have their own set of rules and standards as to how their employees should behave at work. However, there are occasions where personal relationships sour and the impact of such a breakdown can infiltrate the workplace, resulting in adverse behaviours being displayed by one or either of the parties.

 

Conflict of interest

 

If your employee has a personal relationship with a close business associate, this can create a conflict with the professional duty they owe to you. Common examples include employees who hold second jobs with other employers.

 

Subjective and unfair recruitment decisions

 

Personal relationships could lead to allegations of unfair recruitment decisions if not managed appropriately. To avoid such issues arising, if an employee has a personal or family connection to a job applicant, ideally they should not take part in the recruitment process.

 

Grievances & unlawful behaviours

 

If a personal relationship has broken down and one of the parties is acting inappropriately, you risk a grievance being raised if the matter is not managed appropriately within the workplace. If you have introduced measures to address conflict between parties who have personal relationships, but have done so in a discriminatory or unfair way, you should be mindful this too can lead to grievances being raised.

Likewise, if a relationship breakdown or disagreement results in workplace discrimination (such as bullying or harassment) or misconduct (such as physical altercations), you as the employer must take action to deal with the situation in a fair and lawful way, typically as prescribed by your relevant organisational policy.

 

How to handle personal relationships at work

 

Once aware of some of the challenges you face with personal relationships at work, it’s important to consider what measures you can take to address and reduce the potential risks. Any practical steps taken to manage personal relationships at work must be fair, lawful and reasonable, and not discriminate on the grounds of a “protected characteristic” (gender, marital status, age, disability, gender reassignment, marriage and civil partnership, pregnancy and maternity, race, religion or belief, and sex).

One practical measure is the introduction of an employee declaration form during the recruitment process. Job applicants could be asked to disclose any personal relationships with existing employees. While this information should not be used as a reason to bar employment, it allows the organisation to take reasonable steps to safeguard workplace integrity.

Employers can also require existing staff to report any personal relationships within the workplace. This enables managers to assess and address potential conflicts of interest appropriately. For instance, employees involved in recruitment or selection should not interview or make hiring decisions for individuals with whom they have a personal relationship.

In cases where employees in the same team are in a relationship, employers might meet with them to discuss any potential or perceived impact on their colleagues. Clear measures can then be agreed upon to maintain team harmony and professionalism.

Where a relationship exists between a manager and a subordinate, an alternative line manager or role transfer may be considered. Any transfer should involve a role of similar seniority and must avoid discrimination. If a transfer is necessary, it is crucial to follow proper procedures to redeploy the individual and formally vary their contract terms.

 

 

Legal considerations

 

In the UK there are no specific laws governing personal relationships at work, however there are broader employment laws such as the Equality Act 2010 and the Protection of Harassment Act 1997 that may apply when managing such workplace relationships. The Equality Act prevents direct and indirect discrimination, harassment or victimisation and the Protection of Harassment Act 1997 allows claims to be brought in the civil court for harassment.

Effective 26 October 2024, the UK implemented the Worker Protection (Amendment of Equality Act 2010) Act 2023, introducing a legal duty for employers to take reasonable steps to prevent sexual harassment in the workplace. This proactive obligation requires employers to establish clear policies, provide regular training, and implement robust reporting mechanisms to foster a safe working environment. Failure to comply can result in increased compensation awards of up to 25% in employment tribunals and enforcement actions by the Equality and Human Rights Commission. Employers are advised to conduct thorough risk assessments, regularly review their procedures, and ensure all staff are aware of the standards expected to effectively mitigate the risk of harassment.

In the context of personal relationships at work, there may be issues of sex discrimination or harassment, particularly if the relationship breaks down. Sex discrimination can occur where a female employee has been asked to leave over a male employee because of their relationship or the breakdown of it. And if an employee believes they have experienced harassment because of their gender, this could also amount to discrimination. In extreme cases, employees may be entitled to resign and claim constructive dismissal in an employment tribunal.

If you are addressing issues arising from personal relationships through your disciplinary process, ensure you have the justification to do so. For example, you must be able to reasonably show that the consequence of the relationship has had a detrimental effect on the business, or that the relationship is in breach of a specific organisational policy.

Mishandling a disciplinary process, or continuing without reasonable justification for doing so, could render any action unfair, including fighting a case for unfair dismissal. And it must be said that depending on the severity of the situation, dismissing an employee could be seen as Draconian and cause ill-feeling with other employees within the workforce.

You can mitigate the risk of an employment tribunal claim by remembering the key principles when managing personal relationships, such as:

 

• Focussing on the impact the relationship is having, not the people involved
• Dealing fairly and consistently with all those involved

 

In terms of data captured regarding personal relationships at work, there must be a genuine need to do so, and its purpose must be to identify and manage measures in place in order to ameliorate risk. You must ensure that any date is stored correctly and kept private and confidential, with only those who require access to it for the purpose of administering and managing the information. This data would also be disclosable if you receive a subject access request from a data subject.

 

Relationship at work policy

 

An appropriate policy setting out the standards for what is expected and what is and is not acceptable behaviour and details actions to be taken if problems arise which will help you to ensure that such situations are handled effectively and consistently.

A written policy also assists line managers to understand their responsibilities and role in managing personal relationships within their team and outlines steps they can legitimately take to appropriately manage such situations as and when they arise.

Setting out the policy’s purpose and scope is a vital part in ensuring your employees support the rules contained within it. Knowing why you are introducing such measures will also bolster and underpin any action you may need to take for a breach of the rules.

Whilst everyone is entitled to a private life, it is sensible to prepare a policy for what happens when complications arise which expose your business to claims of harassment and sex discrimination if the relationship ends acrimoniously.

Your policy should consider factors such as:

 

• Definitions of what constitutes personal relationships
• What happens if the policy is breached
• Consequences of a breach in policy
• Dealing with unwanted personal conduct, or contact following the relationship breaking down
• Managing personal relationships at work, such as behaviours, recruitment, management issues, and conflicts of interest

 

If a complaint comes before the employment tribunal, the tribunal will want to know whether there was a policy in place informing employees of expected behaviours, that the consequences of any breach are clear and that the rules were sufficiently communicated across the business and correctly implemented.

It may also be prudent to ask the individuals involved to sign a relationship at work agreement, sometimes referred to as a “love contract”, to confirm their relationship is consensual whilst also taking into account your anti-harassment rules and policies. Whilst not particularly common in the UK, this may help to reduce the risk of future disputes should the relationship result in workplace complications.

 

Need assistance?

 

DavidsonMorris’ HR specialists work with UK employers on all aspects of workforce management, including issues surrounding personal relationships at work. Working closely with our specialists in employment law, we offer a comprehensive solution to reduce legal risks while looking after the interests of the business. For advice on a specific issue, speak to our experts today.

 

Personal relationships at work FAQs

 

What are personal relationships at work?

Personal relationships at work include friendships, family ties, or romantic connections between employees. These relationships can develop naturally in the workplace due to shared experiences.

 

Are personal relationships at work allowed?

Most workplaces do not prohibit personal relationships outright, but employers may have policies to ensure they do not disrupt team dynamics or create conflicts of interest.

 

Should employees disclose personal relationships?

Many organisations require employees to disclose relationships, especially if they involve a manager and a subordinate, to address potential conflicts of interest or allegations of bias.

 

Can personal relationships lead to disciplinary action?

Disciplinary action is unlikely unless the relationship breaches workplace policies, such as causing conflicts of interest, impacting productivity, or leading to inappropriate behaviour.

 

What risks do personal relationships pose to employers?

Risks include conflicts of interest, favouritism, workplace disruptions, harassment claims, and breaches of confidentiality.

 

How can employers manage these risks?

Employers can implement clear policies, provide training on professionalism, encourage transparency, and ensure fair treatment to mitigate risks.

 

Do personal relationships affect promotions or rewards?

If not managed properly, relationships may lead to perceived or actual favouritism, which can affect workplace morale and fairness.

 

Can employers prohibit workplace relationships?

Employers can set policies that restrict relationships in specific situations, such as between managers and their direct reports, but outright bans are generally discouraged as they may invade privacy.

 

What should employees do if a relationship impacts their work?

Employees should address concerns openly with their manager or HR department to seek a resolution that ensures professionalism and workplace harmony.

 

What support is available for managing workplace relationships?

HR departments typically provide guidance and support to employees and managers to ensure personal relationships are handled appropriately and fairly.

 

Glossary

 

Term	Definition
Personal Relationships	Close connections between employees in the workplace, including friendships, family ties, or romantic relationships.
Conflict of Interest	A situation where a personal relationship could affect an employee’s ability to act impartially or in the organisation’s best interest.
Favouritism	Preferential treatment given to someone based on a personal relationship rather than merit or performance.
Workplace Policy	A set of rules and guidelines created by employers to manage personal relationships and maintain professionalism.
Disclosure	The act of informing an employer or HR department about a personal relationship that could impact workplace dynamics.
Harassment	Unwanted behaviour, including that related to personal relationships, that violates an individual’s dignity or creates a hostile work environment.
Professionalism	Conduct that reflects respect, fairness, and adherence to workplace standards, regardless of personal relationships.
Workplace Dynamics	The interactions and relationships between employees that influence team performance and morale.
Confidentiality	The principle of keeping sensitive workplace information private, which can be at risk in close personal relationships.
Transparency	Open and honest communication about workplace relationships to prevent misunderstandings or conflicts.
Disciplinary Action	Consequences imposed by an employer for breaching workplace policies, potentially including those related to personal relationships.
HR (Human Resources)	The department responsible for managing workplace policies, employee relations, and resolving conflicts, including those arising from personal relationships.
Bias	An unfair preference or prejudice, often linked to personal relationships, which can affect decision-making in the workplace.
Workplace Harmony	A positive and collaborative environment where employees work effectively together without disruption from personal issues.
Risk Mitigation	Steps taken by employers to minimise potential negative impacts of personal relationships on the workplace.
Manager-Subordinate Relationship	A personal relationship between a manager and their direct report, which may lead to conflicts of interest or perceived favouritism.
Code of Conduct	A formal document outlining acceptable behaviours and expectations for employees, including guidelines on personal relationships.